Have any of you seen someone type this? “tl;dr”?  I personally have, more often than ever these days.  I honestly had no idea this thing stood for something.  In fact, for the longest time I was under the assumption that it was an improperly parsed Unicode character. ( Look it up kids, it’s far too late in the evening to be explaining anything remotely resembling programmatic logic. )  At any rate, I decided to Google it today, and damn my eyes, it’s another acronym!  As if we don’t already have enough of that garbage floating around the internet, leave it to this new generation of socially retarded simian cluster fucks to come up with something like this.

It stands for “Too Long; Didn’t Read”.  Go figure, kids these days can’t sit still long enough to even read, let alone spell out and entire sentence.  Honestly, I know public school is about as functional as an asshole on an elbow, but Christ on a cracker is it really this bad?  Amusingly enough these are the same children who will read their live journal friends list for hours upon hours with a total character count of the bible read, but put them in front of one single article that has more than a paragraph and words greater than 2 syllables and they run faster than their mother from the abortion clinic… yes it was another coat hanger abortion joke, you should be used to it by now.  Anything with a small amount of substance apparently “bores” these kids… lovely… I can see the future, and its filled with a kind of stupid that is contagious on a apocalyptic level.  Ever see the movie Idiocracy?

In most cases they actually did read though, so why would they say something online the lines of them not reading it if in fact, they had?  Simple, allow me to show you some scenarios as to why this new little epidemic of skull-fucking intelligence has come to be a new staple on the forehead of our latest batch of complete failures of moral society.

·         They read it, but didn’t understand it. Instead of keeping their mouths shut, which apparently is impossible for the ages 14-17, they say they didn’t read it, usually following up with some asinine remark about “epic failure” or “pwnd”.

·         They read it, and did understand it, but have no better response to say so in an attempt to sound witty, they say they didn’t bother reading it… which makes about as much sense as a penguin fucking a polar bear.

·         They didn’t even bother clicking the link, but want to see themselves speak.  This is usually the case.

·         They are complete and utter failures as children, as well as human beings, and will generally be serving me my fries in 5 years.

Terms like this, “tkr”, and other acronyms of this sort that have been spewed forth from teen bobber movie featuring some random teenage who soon-to-be-paris-hilton-dead-in-a-bathtub-raped-and-drugged coined.  This is our future people, isn’t, it, bright?