http://www.gorgeousgamers.com/users/resoc9p2

I'd like to start out that this is my first visit, so this may be more of a review of my overall impression of the site than the fucksmack I linked above.

I'd like to note that 19 out of the first 20 female gamer profiles I saw on the list noted, under 'Wii', had 'Zelda: The Twilight Princess' under favorites. I'd like to thank all of you twats for making me never want to buy this game for fear that I'd be purchasing the Nintendo equivalent to Hello Kitty: Save A Fucking Princess Edition.

That aside, let me get on to the subject at hand.

Just a note before I start, I hate people that make profiles on these sites and don't fill in information. This post is to prove that, even though you're probably just a waste of bandwidth and will never touch that profile again, you are not safe from the prying eyes and harsh words of the MyTards category of P2K.

Let me begin by saying that this asshat has a profesionally done photograph of himself as his main picture. This immediately makes me assume that it's a fake picture. Why you'd use a fake picture that looks like that one moron from that one horrible 80s movie is beyond me.

I'd like to point out this fuckstork's lack of content. Sure, he's new. Great. But he isn't even the newest member, and the, what, 18 or 19 people that are newer than him by around a day or two have profiles filled out to the metaphorical brim.

Ahh, but here's the catch. The other people on the same list as him are women. And while I'm not sexist, they tend to be more apt to fill out a profile rather than just wasting the bandwidth on a fairly respectable site (...for the most part).

Why, you might ask me. Why, Goat? Why is he on a page full of women?

Ah, well, let me tell you, little ones. Let me explain to you why Corey Fucking Feldman is on a page full of girls on a site for gamers without a single game listed in his profile, let alone, well, ANYTHING.

The first point is why he's on a page full of girls. Apparently, and this is legitimately the FIRST time I have EVER seen this, he put his sex in wrong. Yes, that's right. Corey Feldman is listed as a woman.

How moronic can you be? I know this may seem like a little thing to criticize, but even the asstards that we review on a daily basis know well enough to not FAIL AT ENTERING A GENDER. And here I thought there could be no greater failure than the level of tard-dom that we've found of late. This guy baby steps over the line and takes it to a new level.

This might be a little bit of an assumption, but I'm going to go for it. I'm going to stretch.

This uncorked bottle of liquid retardation came to a gamer website, a profile website, for the same reason that most morons with a pin dick barely wriggling between their legs do. He came because there was the possibility that there were gamer girls on the site. And, as every male knows, gamer girls are easy. Yeah. That's sarcasm, there. Don't get your NES-Controller-spotted underoos in a knot.

Now, perhaps I'm taking out my frustrations on an innocent. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe Corey Feldman just hasn't gotten around to filling out his profile and that actually IS his photo.

...yeah, right.